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Names have been changed to protect the innocent.
All questions answered, all answers questioned.
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Nutritional need is not established in humans.
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In emergency, break glass, pull down handle.
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Freshest if used before date specified.
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Use only in well-ventilated areas.
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No user-serviceable parts inside.
Warning, contents are flammable.
No shirt, no shoes, no service.
Alarm will sound if door opened.
You break it, you've bought it.
You need not be present to win.
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Part of a daily balanced diet.
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You must be present to win.
Caution, low-flying ideas.
Honk if you can read this.
No purchase is necessary.
More taste, less filling.
Internet access required.
Not a low-calorie food.
Don't try this at home.
Wash hands after using.
Consume in moderation.
Store in a cool place.
For external use only.
Mix well before using.
Your mileage may vary.
Money-back guarantee.
Shake well before use.
Lather, rinse, repeat.
Use only as directed.
Results not typical.
Consume responsibly.
Ignore this notice.
Slippery when wet.
Unplug after use.
Same-day service.
No preservatives.
No trespassing.
No exit.
This is the exact situation impeachment was meant for. Let’s hurry up.