Meet Me, Myself And I

The Concept of the Google-Ganger, that other person with your name you or others discover when your name is googled. (Newsweek).

‘Gelwan’ is a very rare surname and every Google reference to ‘Eliot Gelwan’ relates to this one. My grandfather and his sisters emigrated to the US early in the 20th century; my father and one childless brother were born in New York, so the only Gelwans closely related to me are my brother and my children (my wife keeps her own name).

I’ve discovered several other “Gelwans’ through Google. Perhaps uncannily, three others, all in the New York area, (a husband, wife, and brother) are physicians, like myself. I have been in e-contact with them and we cannot figure out any way in which we might be related. Probably we represent a case of convergent evolution — different names from Eastern Europe identically anglicized at Ellis Island.

There is also a Vladimir Gelwan, who used to be the principal dancer with the Latvian National Ballet and now has a ballet school in Berlin. I suspect he and I might be related, since my paternal ancestors are known to have come from Riga. And then there are the Brazilian and Lebanese Gelwans, as discovered by googling. I have written to Berlin, to Brazil and to Beirut, but have not gotten replies.

My father once told me that a Gelwan had once knocked on our door in New York when I was a young child, having come from Brazil and discovered us in a New York City phone book.

Since we have such an attenuated family, my perennial search for Gelwans online is I think motivated by a yearning for family connectivity — especially for my children’s sake — as much as the usual ego-driven pleasures of googling one’s name. Ah, well, for better or worse a fate you with more common names, or those where more geneological precision is possible, will never experience…

Not A River in Egypt…

Denial Makes the World Go Round: “…[R]ecent studies from fields as diverse as psychology and anthropology suggest that the ability to look the other way, while potentially destructive, is also critically important to forming and nourishing close relationships. The psychological tricks that people use to ignore a festering problem in their own households are the same ones that they need to live with everyday human dishonesty and betrayal, their own and others’. And it is these highly evolved abilities, research suggests, that provide the foundation for that most disarming of all human invitations, forgiveness.” (New York Times)

Beowulf vs. The Lord of the Rings

Living Universe vs. 3D Voyage to Schlockville: “Robert Zemeckis’ new film Beowulf gives a whole new meaning to the phrase ‘the sublime and the ridiculous.’ Zemeckis took the oldest and most important text of our ur-language, and turned it into a 3-D Disneyland ride so cheesy he should have called it Anglo-Saxons of the Caribbean. Of course, there’s nothing new or surprising about this. Hollywood has been profaning history and literature since long before Cecil B. DeMille cast Charlton Heston as Moses. If the Bible isn’t sacred, why should the oldest poem in our ancestral language be? But the Beowulf travesty is especially glaring, because of the obvious contrast with another work that mined the same ancient field: J.R.R. Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings. ” — Gary Kamiya (Salon)

Clowns Interrupt CIA Recruitment at UCSB

Students Protest CIA’s Torture Tactics: “…[A] group of protesters interrupted the recruiter’s PowerPoint presentation by placing one of their fellow clowns on the front table, binding his hands and arms, and pouring water on his face to simulate waterboarding torture in front of the presentation’s unsuspecting audience. The group also held a mock press conference citing historical torture statistics and played limbo with a fuzzy green boa before the recruiters quickly packed up their equipment and left the room.” (Daily Nexus)

The Biggest Lie Told To The American People

Ahmadinejad’s Alleged Remarks On Israel: “As someone who was born in Tehran, lived there for seventeen years and is a native Farsi speaker, I have read the original transcripts of the speech in Farsi and want to inform you that Ahmadinejad never said ‘Israel must be wiped off the map,’ but rather, his statement was grossly mistranslated and taken out of context, perhaps to help make a case for military action against Iran.” – Sam Sedaei Huffington Post)

Memory

Remember This: “There is a 41-year-old woman, an administrative assistant from California known in the medical literature only as ‘AJ,’ who remembers almost every day of her life since age 11. There is an 85-year-old man, a retired lab technician called ‘EP,’ who remembers only his most recent thought. She might have the best memory in the world. He could very well have the worst.” (National Geographic Magazine)