Waiter Rant

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“A lot of people are idiots when it comes to the simple act of paying for services rendered so I’ve compiled a little tutorial to make the whole currency exchange a little smoother.” (Waiter Rant via walker)

This is a set of 23 rules a waiter says the customers should always live by around settling up for the great meal they have just had. This waiter begins to sound a little like a dominatrix as you read, but as one commenter said if you want to eat anywhere a second time, don’t ignore the rules. As a frequent diner out and (in a past life, and only briefly) a waiter, many of these are common sense, but there are some surprises. For example,

“2. Ask for the check. Sounds simple right? It’s considered rude for a waiter to drop a check without the customer asking first. Some people are unaware of that convention so they sit around pissed off wondering why the waiter hasn’t produced the checkbook. We’re not psychic!”

I have often become impatient waiting for the check, feeling both cynically that the investment in rapid pleasing service ends once you’ve had your meal and somehow feeling it is impolite to show my impatience by summoning them over. If I do, I am often apologetic about being in a rush. I guess I can jettison the guilt!