As readers of FmH know, I love New Scientist; I have a print subscription too, although I’ve usually read everything of note online before it comes in the mail. I particularly love the droll wit of the Feedback section at the rear of each issue. There you’ll find, for example, their irregular series on nominative determinism (the doctrine that the sound of your name governs your role in life), of which they find dramatic examples. The null device just took note of this Feedback item about semiopathy:
AND continuing the theme of semiopathy –empathy with objects such as “alarmed doors”–reader Sarah Gribbin tells us that she has been studying “Biology: Brain and Behaviour” with the Open University. This has meant writing a lot of essays and taking a lot of exams, so she often finds herself sympathising with what she finds described as “nervous tissue”.
Kathy Haskard, meanwhile, tells us of the wave of sympathy that washed over her when she saw a sign on a country road in Tasmania saying: “Warning, depressed bridge ahead”. Roger Lampert, on the other hand, was perhaps suffering more from semiophobia when, at an early age, he was deeply distressed by the sight of the local “family butcher”.
Other readers’ responses to signs are more those of confusion rather than emotional involvement. Andrew Carter, for example, notes his problem arriving at a definitive interpretation of a sign near his parents’ house that states, without hindrances such as punctuation: “Dead slow children playing”.
And Tony Lovatt is surprised that his local supermarket announces unashamedly that it sells “minute steaks”–though he says that they are indeed very small.
In the countryside near where Greg Johnson lives, horse stud farms often have signs at the roadside advertising “stable manure” for sale. He is grateful for these signs, he says, because he hates to think what might happen if he were to accidentally purchase some unstable manure–which, presumably, might explode or run riot round the roses.
Meanwhile, Sandy Henderson tells us that at Dunblane, near where he lives, is a sign that reads “Hummingbird House Training Centre”. Henderson says he hadn’t realised that hummingbirds needed house training, but it was very thoughtful of someone to set up a centre to provide it.
Finally, Simon Rodgers says he came across a set of railings in Cambridge with a sign that announced: “Bicycles may be removed”. A couple of bikes were chained up to the railings. As they were clearly being offered for free, Rodgers regretted not having any bolt cutters with him–he could have saved himself a walk home.
